Disconnected

 

“We demand too much of life, too little of ourselves”

-Christopher Lasch, The Culture of Narcissism: An American Life in an Age of Diminishing Expectations.

I suppose every older generation worries about the younger one.  Certainly, my baby boomer generation was of great concern to our parents, our teachers and coaches, law enforcement, the government and business leaders facing the daunting challenge of employing these young rebels.  

Looking back, I think we were just at the beginning of the unraveling, the great disconnect.  Two world wars, industrialization and mobility had already chipped away at the connections of place and kinship. Radio, movies and television opened eyes and ears in ways that would have been unimaginable to our ancestors.  Higher education prompted us to question our values, challenge authorities and proceed to seriously doubt their motives as well as the promises they had made to us.

Then we sort of got over it, took our place at the wheel, started making money and got very comfortable. Certainly not all of us, there are plenty of broken people and shattered dreams among aging baby boomers.  And most of us were late getting back to the values and lessons we had rejected in our youth. While we indeed may have been late in returning to those “values and lessons”, they were there.  They were in our head and in our heart.  There was a foundation, overgrown and neglected perhaps, but still there.  We might not have been able to go home again, but we remembered what it was like and why it mattered.

That was then, this is now and everything has changed. Much has been said and written about the impact of political extremism, the failure of our educational institutions, inflation, the ever-increasing gap between the rich and the poor, the bane of social media, the failure of the church, unchecked immigration, inequalities, injustice and more “isms” to fret about every day.  All these things have contributed in significant ways to the angst, anger, frustration and ultimately, the nihilism of so many young people.

But I think there is a larger underlying problem, and it did not just happen overnight.  There is a reason why these social, cultural, political, technological and economic challenges are having such negative effects on young people.  And that reason is the lack of positive, meaningful connections with other people, people who are actually part of their lives not some photoshopped stranger on their smartphone.

In almost every area of their lives younger generations are missing the connections that benefited so many of us baby boomers.  The connections weren’t perfect and some benefited more than others, but overall, we were more personally connected back then.  More of us grew up in two parent households. Most of  had siblings around, some even in the same bedroom.  We tended to live closer to grandparents, aunts, uncles and cousins.  We went to church more regularly even if we didn’t want to go.  More of us attended smaller schools where there were not hundreds or even thousands of kids in our graduating class.  We were more likely to be around other kids in the neighborhood, free to wander and play and fall down.  We even learned the word no and suffered the consequences of disobedience at home or at school.  Sometimes we were made to feel bad or sad or angry, but there always seemed to be someone there to give us a hug.  We weren’t always happy or entertained and learned to live with that reality.  We even discovered early on and accepted that life is not fair.

As a society we must make some changes.  Young people need connections beyond just sharing grievances and bad ideas with other disconnected young people online.  They need families and friends who have families.  They need more discipline and even more love.  They need to be taught how to fly on their own and take responsibility even when it’s difficult or inconvenient.  They need more physical activity and less sugar.  Read books, book in hand and turning the pages. Learn to write in cursive, memorize poems and scripture and words of wisdom.  Learn to speak clearly and look people in the eye.  Think less of themselves and more of others treating them as they themselves would wish to be treated.  Listen more than talk.  Pay attention.  Accept that life is hard and at some point, they will endure pain and suffering.  Believe there is something more and better beyond this short life that we must live now in these bodies on this planet.  Always be thankful, don’t make excuses and never give up.  And stay connected...to real people. 

2026 Halftime Review

 

“I believe that everything happens for a reason.  People change so you can learn to let go, things go wrong so you can appreciate them when they’re right, you believe lies so eventually you learn to trust no one but yourself, and sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together.”

-Marilyn Monroe (born 100 years ago on June 1, 1926)

 

_IRAN

I predicted this would be more difficult than expected. Will it turn out to be more trouble than it was worth? Not if we achieve what we initially set out to do.  But I expect it to end with some sort of watered-down agreement that will be spun by both sides as a win. For as long as Islamic extremists remain in Iran and throughout the Middle East, and for that matter around the world; and as long as Western Civilization depends on oil, the blood feud will continue, unlikely to end well for either side.

_INFLATION

With the Iran conflict dragging on oil prices shot up almost 50% at one point only adding to the stubborn inflationary pressure Americans have been facing throughout most of this decade.  A reckoning is coming and it will not be pretty.

_TRUCKING

This subject means more to me because I am involved with it on a daily basis recruiting management, sales and executive talent for the industry.  It should mean a lot to everyone because certain truck drivers who had no business being on the road were having headline-making deadly accidents on a weekly basis.  Turns out that hundreds of thousands of truck drivers, most of those entering this country over the past 5 years, literally had no business driving 18-wheelers. The government crackdown is pulling thousands of these drivers (and trucks) off the road.  The result is rising freight rates and some relief for trucking companies that have suffered through a painful 3 year “freight recession”.  The downside is that those higher rates will end up adding to the cost of most everything. 

_FIFA World Cup

I really tried to watch it, but I fail to appreciate the “beautiful game”.  The athletes are exceptional and there are moments when the matches are as exciting as any sport one might watch.  I know this because I wait and watch those moments via recaps on You Tube.  I can see soccer being a great sport if you’re playing or your kids are playing.  But as a spectator sport, especially on television, it’s like spending two hours watching an ant farm.   For me the best thing coming out of the World Cup are the comments from our international visitors, in particular those from Europe.  Turns out that America is a great place after all despite what they have been fed by the media, entertainment and political elites.  Who knew? 

_DEMOCRATIC SOCIALISM

Why not give it a try, right? There are plenty of reasons why some people are embracing it, most of them revolving around “affordability” and “equity” grievances.  But life is not fair and they will discover soon enough neither is Democratic Socialism. 

_ICE

The aggressive “catch and remove” approach has been toned down a bit, but this remains a hot-button issue that will get a lot of attention from both parties going into the mid-terms.

_250

OK, technically July 4^th is in the second half of the year, but America is 250 years old so I will include it in the first half, the second half and whenever the mood strikes me.  Happy Birthday to us.

Another Crossroad

 

It seems that with every holiday, we are told that America is “At A Crossroad”.  These “At A Crossroad” commentaries come in all shades and shapes.  Some are hopeful, some an urgent call for action.  Some are resentful, others regretful and at their worst declare that America was doomed from the start and the only answer is to wipe the slate clean and start over.

I take these “crossroad warnings” seriously but always with the belief that we Americans will figure it out.  It won’t be perfect.  It never is and never could be because human beings are involved.  The freedoms that allow some of us to take the wrong turn allow others to right the ship.

Our history is one of sins and salvation. If one chooses to obsess over the sins of the fathers, they will never see the good things, the confessions and self-corrections.  They will let their image of the nation’s dark past blind them to the progress we’ve made and the underlying goodness of America.  Those who choose to only celebrate our success and are unwilling to admit our failures are in danger of becoming like the parents of a child who “can do no wrong” remaining uncorrected and over-indulged.

America is changing.  It always has and always will because people are changing, some for better and some for worse.  The American system of government remains the best humans have come up with so far. But if by way of our freedoms or by force we abandon it, others will surely take our place.

The Verdict, The Sentence, The Aftermath

Considering that the crime and the trial took place less than an hour south of where I live, I have paid a fair amount of attention to the Karmelo Anthony-Austin Metcalf story;  from the time Karmelo stabbed and killed Austin right up through the trial, the guilty verdict, the 35-year prison sentence and the aftermath.

Most white folks feel that the verdict was right and the sentence was appropriate, if anything perhaps Anthony should have received a life sentence or worse.  And they are fed up with black politicians and activists playing the race card every time they don’t like the answer or the outcome.  I take it all with a grain of salt. This is just part of their job description.  It’s the way things work.

But at a deeper level I am guessing that a lot of blacks are once again having questions about our justice system.  While many, if not most blacks likely agree that Karmelo Anthony was guilty; they are asking themselves how this would have turned out if Karmelo had been a white kid represented by a blue-chip defense attorney.  Probably a guilty verdict of some sort, but perhaps to a lesser charge, maybe just manslaughter.  Even if he’d been found guilty of the same charge carrying the same range of sentencing, would he have gotten 35 years?

There remains in the black community a nagging sense that white people tend to get the benefit of the doubt.  When it’s between a 5 or a 99 year sentence the young white kid gets 10 or 15 tops, the black kid gets more, as in 35 years.  If there is potential for a lesser charge or a reduced sentence, the white guy is more likely to receive it or so it seems.

One may say that is no longer the way it works.  That these days the scales are balanced, maybe even tipping slightly in favor of non-whites.  I don’t think that is the case, but even if it were, it’s a recent development.  The black experience in America has seen enough injustice to last well beyond the lives of those who suffered the most from it.  Therefore, the questions and the doubts are never far away and tend to readily surface in cases such as this one.

 “Time heals all wounds, but it does not erase the scars.”- Jane Yolen

                                                            

Other Roads

 

Last week I made a quick trip down to Austin.  From Grayson County the most direct route takes one down 75 and somehow through Dallas; and if you’re lucky it spews the traveler on to I-35 South toward Waco and beyond.  Many years ago, within 15 minutes after clearing the Big D hurdle the traffic thinned out and it became an easy drive in the country.  But over the years it’s changed.  It’s more noticeable to old guys like me.  Now it’s essentially urban freeway traffic all the way only with more trucks.  And about the time you get to Round Rock it becomes an urban traffic jam, more like a “no way” than a freeway.  And during rush hour the highways in and around Austin are more stop than go. 

So, when I headed back north the next day, I took the scenic route, up 183 to Lampasas and 281 all the way to I-20 then to Weatherford and north on 51 up to Cook County and 82 back home.  It takes an hour longer to go that way but it’s time well spent.  Most of all, if you are Texas born and raised, it feels like it used to be or at least the way you thought it was.  You understand that it’s changed, but there are reminders. The land, the animals, the people; the well-kept farms and ranches, productive with tight fences, new metal barns standing beside what’s left of an old wooden one.  Healthy looking cattle and horses, even lambs and goats in some places.  The biggest and best-looking places are mostly owned by wealthy folks from the big cities. They hire locals to do the hard work but can still tell their business associates they’ll be at the ranch this weekend “doing some work around the place”.

It’s not all good though.  One can’t help but see the signs of poverty and decay.  Less so in the Hill Country where city money and the old German influence make a difference.  But elsewhere in rural Texas it’s there. Beat up cars and pick-ups parked on dirt yards in front of old farmhouses or mobile homes.  Maybe a few toys laying around. Always some old tires.  Maybe a lawnmower that no longer works.  A dog or two lying on the porch or under a piece of farm equipment, waiting for something or someone to chew on.  There aren’t many good jobs in these places.  And it’s impossible to make a living these days farming or ranching on a small scale.  But folks get by, legally or otherwise.  It’s not pretty, but it’s also part of Texas.

If you are a recent arrival to the Lone Star state maybe it’s what you thought Texas would be right up until you found yourself stuck in traffic or living in a suburban neighborhood that just looks like every other suburban neighborhood and not much at all like Texas.  But Texas is still out there.  You won’t find it from an Interstate highway.  Take some other roads. Have lunch at the “best” local restaurant wherever you happen to be at lunchtime.  Stop and read some historical markers.  You might come to understand how and why native Texans feel the way they do about this state.  Just don’t cross the yellow line and if a driver in an on-coming vehicle lifts a finger or two from the steering wheel, they are not flipping you off.  It’s just sign language for howdy.

The Sting

 

“It sometimes seems that every living thing can bite or poke or sting or shoot you.”-Lawrence Wright, from his book “God Save Texas”.

The other day I was taking an assortment of stuff from the garage over to the barn, part of the seasonal ritual of putting up some things and pulling out others.  I was in and out of the barn at least half a dozen times.  When I finally closed the side door and locked up, my left hand caught fire or so it seemed.  I looked down and just above the knuckle on my ring finger a huge red wasp was lodging a violent protest against my invasion of his space.  I knocked him off my hand and stepped back to see the nest of red wasps at the top of the door.  After getting stung by yellow jackets a few years ago that were nesting at the top of a garage door, I am usually more diligent in watching for wasps as well as most anything that flies, crawls, hops or has a tail.  

Rather than take them on empty-handed, I retreated over to the garage and armed myself with a can of wasp and hornet spray.  I returned and wiped out most of them.  Those who escaped buzzed me but were clearly unable to hit a fast-moving target.

I got back to the house and rubbed Benadryl cream on the red and swelling skin that ran from the middle of my finger, over the knuckle and the top of my hand.  Later on my wife cut a piece of aloe vera and told me to rub it on my hand and finger.  Eventually the pain went away and by bedtime it just itched. 

The interesting thing is that the next morning my hand not only felt better, it felt better than before the sting.  You see I have some arthritis in my hands as well as a condition called Dupuytren’s Contracture. Dupuytren’s is a genetic disorder that causes the tendons and ligaments in your hands and fingers to thicken and get stiff.  It can lead to locking “trigger” finger and when it’s bad enough it requires surgical release.  It’s also known as Viking’s Disease since it is so prominent in people with Scandinavian DNA (of which I have 20%).  Mine got bad enough in one finger a few years ago that I had to have the surgery.  It was for my left ring finger.  

The surgery fixed the trigger finger but it’s never felt quite right and there is arthritis to boot.  But after the wasp sting it feels great.  There has been considerable research done regarding the efficacy of bee and wasp venom for the treatment of arthritis.  The results have been promising, but so far as I can tell it’s not being prescribed yet.  Put me down as a yes for test trials.  Based on this one random sting, it seems to work.  Now if I could just figure out how to train the bees and wasps to sting me in the right places.

The Celestial City

 

As one whose “journey of faith” had been anything but clean and simple, now with the passing of time I can honestly proclaim there are evil forces at work here on planet earth and beyond.  These forces are powerful, well-organized and committed to their purpose.  They have a hierarchy and there is one at the top.  They exist to create chaos and confusion, to transform what was created as good in the beginning into something they can claim as their own.  Some say they know they will ultimately be defeated but in the time that is left are doing everything they can to make life worse and take as many souls with them as possible.

As a Christian I believe what the Bible says about this.  I have also noticed that many other religions and traditions acknowledge the existence of evil forces; spirits to be more precise.  And they have names.  Some of those named in the Bible are likely the same spiritual beings in other religions but with different names. 

But for now, sticking with the Bible there are over 300 passages of scripture referring to evil spirits, the devil, Satan, Lucifer, etc. If one professes to be a Christian, they would be hard-pressed to deny the reality of evil spirits and their leader.  And if one should consider what the Bible says about these evil spirits and their leader, they would know that these spirits do not come wearing a red jump suit with horns, a tail and a pitchfork. Most often they come as a thought or an idea.  Sometimes they are delivered intentionally or otherwise by someone who looks a lot like us. But most often they simply arrive at the door of our soul like a package we weren’t expecting and dare not to open.  Yet sometimes we do open the package and are seldom ever the same.

We are now in a time when the those who deliver evil are lined up at the door.  Content that would have been banned 50 years ago is now mainstream.  Words, images, music and what has come to represent news, opinion, influence and entertainment conspire to tempt us, teach us and lead us astray. We are told what is good and what is bad, what is permissible and that truth is our own, as long as we are tolerant, inclusive and kind.

In John Bunyan’s classic Pilgrim's Progress, Christian and Faithful are on a treacherous journey to the Celestial City but must first pass through Vanity.  Here there is a Fair that goes on throughout the year.  Satanic personages identified as Beelzebub, Apollyon and Legion control Vanity and the Fair.  All the temptations of the world are in the marketplace.  Few of those who attempt to reach the Celestial City successfully pass through Vanity Fair without being drawn away.  

I’ll say no more lest I spoil the story.  It is enough to say that we are living in a modern day Vanity Fair where the marketplace of temptations has become omnipresent and inescapable.  And the question remains how does one reach the Celestial City?

“For to speak the truth, there are but few that care thus to spend their time, but choose rather to spend their time to be speaking of things to no profit.”- John Bunyan, Pilgrim’s Progress